Most Troublesome
by Viceroy Elf
Summary: The way she talks, the way she looks at me, the way she makes me feel... This is most troublesome.


Most Troublesome

This is most troublesome.

When I started this new life as what we'll call a 'refugee' I hadn't suspected to grow attachments to the people I had met, at least not significant ones. Supporting my family was my first priority. That's the way it was going to be.

And yet.

"Come on, Hawke, This is where it is!"

"I'm coming, Merrill. You still haven't told me what it is that has interested you so."

I met this young Elven girl in her Dalish clan. An apprentice to her Clan's Keeper, she was assigned to help me and my companions with the restoration of a relic for a certain witch of the wilds. When we were informed that after doing so, she would be left in our care, I was hesitant. What's more, my brother, and our companion, Aveline, were unwilling to help her, especially after the revelation that she could perform blood magic. It seemed we would have to deny the Keeper's request. But, I couldn't do it. There were a number reasons for my saying yes. But I suppose the one that settled it was, well, I could relate to her.

Maybe it was the fact that she was the first mage I had seen since coming to Kirkwall who wasn't a sniffling coward on the run from templars. Maybe because, like myself when I was younger, she was very reserved from the world and people around her. Whatever it was, something about her made me take a liking to her.

It also helped that I thought she was cute.

However, that taken into consideration, I didn't expect her to take such a liking to me. Or that such feelings would develop into the situation that's been the cause of much speculation amongst my friends.

My relationship with this girl has ascended from simple admiration, to something more.

One might even say I was in lo-

"Here it is!"

Merrill grabbed my arm and dragged me to the front of a store in hightown.

"What? Is this what you wanted to show me?"

"I've never seen such a place! The decorations, the food, and there's such a heavenly aroma!"

"Merrill, it's a sweets shop. People sell confectionaries here."

"Like food? But this shop is so much different from eating establishments I'd heard of before."

"It doesn't make meals in that way. Food here is eaten more for pleasure than sustenance."

"How strange. Such a custom would never have been practiced in the clan. Do you think we could have some?"

As soon as she asked, she gave me that look. Oh, that dreaded look. Her deep, green eyes would widen, and she would smile like a child seeing his mother to walk him from school. It was the kind of thing you would here about in story books; a look that could bring the strongest men to their knees. Ludicrous to even imagine, and yet that same feeling was compelling me at this exact moment.

"… Very well then. Go find us somewhere to sit, I will buy us something to eat."

I fell to that look, and would likely do so in the near future.

As soon as I gave her the pastry, she looked like she was about to ravage it.

"Merrill. Eat it slowly."

She looked up at me quizzically.

"In human society, when enjoying such confectionaries, one must take into account that the flavor is more important than the actual food. Eat it slowly, and think only about the favor."

She seemed confused, but did as I advised ad took her fist small bite. As she slowly chewed the delicacy, her face brightened into a cheery smile.

"Mmmmm!"

The words 'that's so adorable' came to mind, but I couldn't allow myself to say them out loud. However, something told me my coarseness would only last so much longer.

As we ate, we fell into a comfortable silence, content in just being with each other.

A silence that would soon be disturbed.

"Hawke? What's your last name?"

I stopped eating to look at Merrill with confusion. "Hmm?"

"I had heard that in Human and Dwarven culture, it was custom to be assigned two names. A first name to be addressed by, and a last name to be shared by those in a family. What is your last name?"

"Hawke is my last name, Merrill?"

Now it was her turn to look confused.

"That's strange. Do you not have a first name?"

"I do. I prefer to be addressed by my last name."

"Why is that?"

"… Because it's silly."

She covered her mouth to conceal a laugh. "I'm sorry, but what's so silly about it?"

"…"

"Come on, please?"

Oh no. It's that look. No, not the look. Oh…!

"… Voltaen. My first name is Voltaen."

Damn.

She looked surprised as soon as I told her my name. "That's an Elven name! What's so silly about it?"

"It's not the name so much, it's the fact that I'm a human with an Elven name. It's uncommon to say the least."

I knew I would have to explain myself before she got defensive.

"Well, that is strange, I suppose. Why exactly is it that you have such a name?"

"It's something of a long story."

She put her hand on mine. "I'd really like to know."

Then she gave me the look.

"If you insist."

Again, I fold. I'll beat that accursed look one day.

"Have I told you about my father?"

"You told me he was an apostate, but nothing beyond that."

"Well, My father spent his youth as an apostate with Dalish elves."

"Really!" she seemed particularly interested.

"When it became apparent that he was a mage, my father's parents wanted to send him to the circle. However, my father wasn't too fond of the idea. The night before he was supposed to be taken, he ran way to the forests. Supposedly, he was found by Dalish elves who at first, weren't too keen on the idea of having a human in their midst. According to him, they were going to cast him away, but their keeper spoke out for him. He told them my father was a mage, and asked him to show everyone. Once the knew he was a mage, they were a little more willing to allow him to speak."

"That makes sense. We Dalish respect any with the gift of magic."

"Exactly. Anyway, once my father explained his situation, the keeper allowed him to stay with the Dalish elves. He taught my father everything he would need to know in order to control his magic and keep safe from templars, as well as a few things about the Dalish elves. My mother used to comment that he was more elf than human."

At this point I found myself laughing lightly. Talking about this with someone seemed to give me a happy feeling. I hadn't talked about my father to anyone but Carver in quite some time. It was nice to have someone to confide such things in.

"That's such a sweet story! But what does all that have to do with your name?"

"The keeper of the clan was named Voltaen. And it he whom I am named for."

Merrill smiled with delight. "How nice of your father to honor a keeper in such a way."

"You'd think so, but the kids at school certainly didn't think so. I suppose I got used to being addressed by my last name over time."

Suddenly something occurred to me. "Merrill. Why exactly did you want to know my last name?"

She jumped a little, and a blush appeared across her cheeks. "Oh, no reason in particular."

Noticing that she'd finished her food, she began to trace her finger on the table. "Merrill Hawke. Has a nice ring to it, don't ya think?"

I stopped and gave an expression of shock and embarrassment. I felt Merrill kiss me on the cheek, and watched with my mouth agape and a bright red blush staining across my face as she cantered away to go do who know what.

This is most troublesome.

**My first attempt at fluff. I'm, like, the biggest Dragon Age nerd in the universe. At least, that's what my friends accuse me of being since I gave my Hawke's father a backstory, as well as one for my Warden in Origins. I just thought this would be a nice way of addressing how adorable I think Merrill is, and explaining the fact that my character's name isn't exactly human. (I really wanted to be an elf; I was super upset when I first heard you had to be a human.)**


End file.
